30 Days 30 Nights

Things are getting real.

Well they are real to begin with, it’s just me who’s (finally) starting to believe it.

Tadi aku balik dari lab pukul 3.30 petang. Rekod ni, tak pernah-pernah balik awal ni. Hehe. Aku datang lab tadi pun sumorang buat muka pelik, apehal lak mamat ni datang lab sehari lepas submit thesis ni.

Anyway, aku sampai rumah tadi, landlord aku ada kat rumah aku. Buat mende tah. Semalam aku call dia, bagi 30-day notice nak keluar rumah. Lepas tu flatmate aku yang bilik sebelah macam teringin lak nak masuk bilik aku, sebab dia dengar bilik aku besar.

Rasa macam pelik pulak, lepas 3 tahun duduk dekat bilik yang sama, tiba-tiba buat tour to a future tenant of the room pulak. Huhu. Mula-mula aku masuk bilik tu, sewa dia £315. Setahun lepas tu jadi £325, fair enough. Lepas tu lagi setahun setengah lepas tu (dalam tiga bulan lepas) landlord naikkan jadi £340.

Semalam masa aku bagi notis dia cakap kalau aku nak cari orang nak ganti aku, sewa untuk orang baru tu £350. Lantakla kan, bukan aku nak kena bayar. Masa flatmate aku tu tengah dok ushar-ushar bilik aku, sibuklah kitorang dok bercakap yang memang bilik aku ni besor. Hampir 2x saiz bilik dia, tapi kan, jengjengjeng, dia pun bayar £340 jugak untuk bilik dia. Lepas tu ada mentol sudah menyala dalam kepala landlord aku..

“Ha’ah size bilik Izzud tu memang almost 2x lagi besar dari bilik ko. Dah cenggitu, I nak charge you nanti £450-460 lah sebulan,”

Haha lantak. Yang penting bukan aku yang bayar.

Anyway, tahniah kepada landlord ku kerana akhirnya telah menaikkan sewa bilikku ke standard Cambridge. 3 tahun aku bayar sewa per square metre yang sangatlah di bawah nilai average kat sini, heh.

Tadi pun dah order kotak untuk ship barang balik tanah air.

Hmm.. Betul ke benda ni sedang berlaku ni. Betul ke dah nak kena balik ni.

Best, tapi tak best. Takut pun ada.

Pesal tah. *terjun bangunan

Greek for ‘I believe’

So.

Thesis dah submit. 227 muka surat. (Kot?).

Aku minum large latte lepas tu. Terus hiperaktif sepanjang hari. Padahal dah selalu dah minum kopi. Apasal entah.

Jadi sekarang tunggu viva aje. Macam banyak aje nak kena studi ni. Nak pergi jalan-jalan pun tak sempat. Cis.

Malam tadi pun mimpi pasal thesis lagi. Ingatkan dah submit ni dah tak fikir sangat dah. Terbangun pukul 4 pagi terus tak tboleh tidur dah. Tapi yang bagusnya, fir the first time in three months, aku makan proper breakfast. 🙂 Pukul 7 pergi Asda, beli lebih kurang, balik buat wrap, dengan salad & salmon. Heh.

Tadi kan aku usha-usha la jadual semester ukm. Lepas tu kan, tertengok la tarikh cuti semester. Wuih, lima minggu! Bestnya bestnya.

Tiba-tiba teringat. Oh, bukan aku yang cuti. Aku dah bukan student dah masa tu.

😦

gile lahhh..

Saya sangaaaaaaattt la nak update.

Tapi memang sekarang saya benar-benar sibuk.

Serius.

Sibuk menulis disertasi yang kini telah mencecah 200 muka surat.

Sibuk itu sungguh serius sampaikan saya rasa bila-bila masa dari sekarang saya akan menjadi gila.

Atau pun saya memang dah gila, saya pun tak pasti.

Tingtong tingtong tingtong.

Saya juga menjadi sedikit anti sosial semenjak April, dengan tidak membalas text sesiapa mahu pun menjawab panggilan telefon.

-well, mungkin kalau orang yang saya hendak yang meng-call saya mungkin saya akan jawab (apa punya ayat da)

Saya juga telah meng-skip banyak acara berjumpa-jumpa orang Malaysia. Aktiviti harian adalah ke lab jam 7.30 pagi dan pulang berbelas jam kemudian.

Ada orang pernah tanya, apa ke lama benor writing up ko ni?**

– abih ko ingat ini macam tulis karangan SPM, duduk dewan 1.5 jam dah siap?

** pikir-pikir balik, aku pun tak sure ye ke orang tanya aku soalan ni. Ke aku berangan aje yang orang tanya aku?

Oh ye. Go Deutschland!

Tetiber

Time saya kawen nanti saya nak buat quickstep dengan lagu latarnya ‘Dead Ringer for Love’ by Meatloaf.

Tetiber.

Ampun!

Yarabbi. Dah 3 bulan tak update.

Mampus.

Tapi bila aku baca balik entri terakhir aku, pasal goals aku dari bulan 12 haritu – berjaya jugak la aku ikat diri aku kat meja selama 3 bulan.

Err.. Hampir 3 bulan. OK la tu kan. Hehe. Cuti Easter jatuh hujung bulan ni, bukan boleh masuk lab pun. Jadi cadangannya nak pergi buat writing-up dekat tempat kawan aku dekat Bristol.

Kononnya lah…

Jadi, apa yang dah di-achieve dalam masa 3 bulan ni? (Saya telah tahu skiing, dan dah turun dari slope bertanda merah – haha – tapi itu bulan 12 punya cerita, jadi tak termasuk dalam misi mengikit-diri-di-meja selama 3 bulan ni).

Paper 1st dah diterima untuk publication!
(Orang lain dah berpuluh-puluh dah publish tak heran pun. Tapi yang berpuluh-puluh tu professor, aku grad student so aku masih dibenarkan gembira kot).

Semalam pulak baru hantar draft ke-infiniti untuk paper kedua. Tapi OK la, paper 1st tu banyak mengajar aku pasal menulis. Dulu tulis tu macam haremmm aje, flow ke mana apa ke mana. Sekarang ni dah mantop sikit le. Hehe.

Lagi satu goal aku nak submit thesis by end of March.

Hm. Tak sempat kot? Huhu. Third paper mungkin sempat. Ada 2 minggu. Positif positif.

You know that you are close to (or supposed to) going back home when your HOD in Malaysia appears in your dream and you have to explain research progress to him/her.

Twice.

Hello There

2 days ago I went to the butcher’s to get some chicken.

Wanted to make chicken casserole, didn’t have any casserole, so it became chicken-in-roasting-pan. Delicious nonetheless.

Haha!

Well that’s not the point of the post.

At the butcher’s, I met a friend who is also a postgrad at my place. He enrolled a week after I did back in 2007.

Guess what? He has submitted his thesis before Christmas. Viva could be around February.

Merde.

I know I should not compare one’s progress with other’s but still, it is a bit discomforting. It made me reflect back on myself.

Compared to that friend of mine, I had a lot of excursions during my time here (you know too well). Excursions, also known as ‘kedai runcit trips’.

Compared to a friend of mine, he probably will not go back to his native country but work here instead. He’s married, and has a kid. So the attachment is understandable.

While I can’t be attached to my work desk for more than one and a half month.

I made a little list of to-do stuffs for next year. Based on the list, it seems plausible that I may be able to submit my thesis by the end of March.

All I have to do is attach myself to the table for 3 months. And stop daydreaming.

I see myself as someone who is very passionate about planning, travelwise. To see and explore. Do something new. West to East, coast to coast. (You’ve got it right – I have already had a route sketched). A friend told me once that I should run a travel agency instead – but I can see that I will be the one who does most of the travels..

My brother said (well more like his FB’s update):

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, and catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

In the meantime, all I need to do is chain myself to the desk.

Just for three months.

:)

I am glad that I fell asleep in the lab today.

I am glad that I decided to stay after that, not coming home earlier nor later.

That way, fate worked its way.

We met.

Talked. It was nice.

And it has added a boost for me to stop stuffing my face, and start running again in winter..

My life (and myself) is weird, but somehow I love it just the way it is 🙂